Thursday, December 31, 2009

Happy New Year's Eve

Hello! Are you doing anything today? Do you have any plans? Of course you know I do <3

So as you can see, I woke up early, but this was actually unplanned XD I've only had about 5 or so hours of sleep ;; (I procrastinated in straightening my hair after my shower)

Today's plan, of course, involved Schaumburg with Tara. I want to go to the mall first, so I can pick up some of Lush's tea tree tonic and steaming tablets, and maybe Sephora, to get some eye primer (I forget the name of the one I was going to get, but I remember what the bottle looks like). Might stop by the Starbucks inside (Of course there's on in the mall, even though there's also one across the street XDDD) to get some macarons. They seem to be the Lolita snack of choice, and everyone's always raving about them anyway. This place is the only one I've ever seen selling them around here (though I'm sure I could go into some kind of specialty bakery or something).

Then, of course MITSUWA. I'm going to try not to spend all of my money on makeup (though with their prices, it's really easy to XD) I was going to buy some plum wine to celebrate with, but I decided to use the bottle of Mike's Hard Lime that was left here after Christmas Eve. I know my grandma certainly won't drink it. We'll come back a little early, so we can eat at Ichiro's (Tara wanted to sit in, so we shall sit!) and then we'll get back to her house, I guess to neaten up. Another full day, but I'm glad. I don't have many hours at work, but at least I'm available today and tomorrow!

I guess tomorrow, I'll talk about what I got, and maybe how much I like it, if I've tried it. I'm still waiting on my brushes. The shipping thing hadn't updated at all yesterday. Laaaaame.

Well, I'm off, my alarm goes off in like 30 minutes, so I'm going to just relax and decide what's cool enough to wear before I'm out and about.

~Lots of Love~

Wednesday, December 30, 2009


Just waiting for tomorrow to come around. I actually didn't realize Thursday was New Year's Eve! I'll probably spend the day with her and her friends. If I don't wake up early enough, that means no blog tomorrow either -_-;

Anyway, with my trip coming up, I'm thinking about all of the things I really want to get. My makeup brush set is coming soon, so I want to prepare for it! I can pretty much keep my skin relatively clear. Not amazingly smooth, but I think that's near impossible for my skin type. I'm really excited for all of the nice things I'll be getting ^_^ I haven't heard anything about my order (I guess because the place I'm shipping it to is closed until Jan 2nd)

You know, ever since I've started using Herbal Essence, I'm definitely impressed. My hair used to get really frizzy and big all the time, but not anymore ^^ I recommend!

Really short, because nothing has happened yet. I spent the day napping, munching on Pepper Jack Cheez-its and sipping my cheap but good green tea!

~Lots of Love~

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Sunny day

It's really pretty and bright outside.... but it's only Tuesday! I want to go somewhere, but I know I'll just spend money XD

Is it just me, or is Lolita clothing getting more and more expensive? I know Bodyline has increased prices (but I've pretty much left them anywa, after that creepy scandal involving the owner Mr. Yan, and besides, Qutieland has waaaay cuter dresses at the same prices <3) but it looks like places like Baby, the Stars Shine Bright and Angelic Pretty have gone from expensive to super extra expensive. I remember when I could get headpieces for $50, now it looks like I'm lucky if I can find one at $80! I have to go to smaller shops and probably commissioning, because even second-hand is probably hundreds upon hundreds. It's hard out there for a Loli XD

Anyway, it's the second day of me waking up while there's still sunlight outside. It's a little weird, considering that I go to sleep really late -_-; I hope it's this nice Thursday!

Today's tea is a rose one, but the rose is overpowered by the actual tea. It's still a good tea, I just wish it had more rose flavor. Once some years ago, my grandma took us to one of those 7 course restaurants. If I remember, the food was good, but what really stood out was this rose and champagne sorbet at the 3rd course that they used as a 'pallet cleanser'. It was sooooo good, even though there was about 3 spoonfuls inside. It was my first experience with rose as food, so I was pleasantly surprised. I've since forgotten everything else I ate there, so I guess that's saying something. I need to get an ice cream maker or something, they actually have a recipe for it ^_^ I swear, it's such a Princess-y treat XD As a flower on its own, roses aren't my favorite (my favorite flower is the lily) but as a tasty sweet, they're awesome! I have a folder in my Lolita section dedicated to cute sweets and recipes, lol. Am I weird? I love everything that's cute, even cute sounding food!

I'll end the blog here, because I don't have anything going on. ;_;

~Lots of Love~

Monday, December 28, 2009


Hello all! ...Well, hello anyone bored enough to read this stuff!
Anyway, I'm up really early today! I went to sleep at around 11p yesterday, which is pretty early. Honestly, my sleep schedule is all over the place. It's more than annoying, trying to keep up. Sometimes I'm tired in the middle of the day, sometimes the middle of the night, and really everything in between. One of the things on my goal list is sleep at a decent time. It's healthier to do so, you know. I probably won't accomplish this until I get a new job though. One that pays more than $300 a month ;_; Hire me please!

Anyway, I took advantage of waking up this early to steep some tea! One of the teas I got my grandma, I believe called the Dragon Lily flavor, it's so good! It's a white tea has a slight taste of apricot, and I love fruit flavored teas most. I'm probably completely unrefined, as I also put tons of sugar in my teas XD What can I say, I was raised on sugar, so most likely your brand of sweet is nowhere near my brand! Ahh, this could only be better if I had some Dominick's sugar cookies. OMG, my mouth is watering just thinking about it. Yeah, I think I'll make this a daily thing too, a nice relaxing cup of tea, a cookie or two, relaxing after a long day of getting yelled at by customers, or just a nice break, and maybe that's when I do a blog. If I can associate the two, I'm sure I really could do this on a daily basis. Got to try harder!

I'm counting down the days until Tara and I go back out to Schaumburg. I'm taking her to my favorite restaurant Ichiro's too. Love love love that restaurant. If I ever somehow become famous, I'm so going to tell everyone about them ^_^ I don't know what I'd do if I showed up and they weren't there anymore, but they're always busy once they open. Seriously, people start pouring in within 30 minutes of them opening for the day (4p-10p everyday). I know she'll love it, the service is wonderful, and they're always so friendly and cool ^_^ That's just the people, the food is amazing! <333 I could rave about them all day.

I really need a curling iron. My straightener can give me curls, but not ringlets like I've been wanting. I'll get a medium sized barrel one and a small barrel one sometime, though I won't be able to use the medium one until my hair grows out more. Oh, I had a weird dream where I could buy super long hair extentions for really cheap. For some reason, I was buying a blonde one. Lol, maybe my subconscious is telling me to be a blonde? Sorry, subconscious, the lightest my hair will be is just a lighter brown, lol. Blonde is for wigs, I like being a permanent brunette.

Got an order confirmation of my brushes, so they'll be here Wednesday or so (hopefully Wednesday, since I'll be gone all day on Thursday, and I don't want to wait until Friday!). I'll have to buy some shampoo for them, because they're so not touching mine! lol I better start preparing my makeup list! They sell a liquid eyeliner over at Mitsuwa that I've been seeing all over the pages of Ageha, so I hope it's good ^^ Anything's got to be better than the Elf brand I got, but that's my fault, because I got it really cheap. I guess that's just one of the things you shouldn't skimp out on ^^;

I'm going to go get some cookies and sugar, and enjoy this tea right!

~Lots of Love~

Sunday, December 27, 2009

Happy Birthday Indeed!

Today's my birthday~
I used to not celebrate it, but lately, people have been actually remembering! It's pretty nice ^^

Also, I just got an order confirmation from DreamV (along with an apology for taking so long to get back, but hey, it was Christmas and then the weekend!), where I ordered on Rakuten. They're shipping them! Yay~! Soon, I'll get a message that tells me it's arrived to my "Japanese address" and I can pay for shipping there ^_^ (shipping seems to be free within the country? I didn't get charged for shipping at all, so maybe it was an exception for that store).

Found a great website about makeup. It's not a a site for designs and styles, it instead explains things, like what each brush does, basic techniques to applying, where to put what and how.... It's super informative. I'm actually really interested in finding this stuff out. My brushes will be in soon (probably Tuesday or something) and when I first saw them, I was a little off-put because it had so many brushes that I didn't know the use of. Now I get it, and can refer to the list any time! I'll have to wait for my next paycheck, so I can start looking at stuff like foundations and whatnot. Oh yeah, and reconfirmed that I do have combination skin. So frustrating! But at least my skin is *very* strong. I could go with a peel right about now. I'll ask my mom about it.

Ugh, I wish I had a better paying job. How do I make these people hire me?? I'm awesome! How else am I supposed to buy out Qutieland's clothing selection anyway? -_-;

Today, I went to work. I got to work with my favorite trio, my bosses Erin and Chevy, and the Kid ^_^ Speaking of the Kid, he seems to be getting more comfortable with us. I can tell he has a goofy sense of humor, but as of now, he's not really showing that side off yet. I hope he'll be around to really enjoy us. Oh, and I forgot my burger at the store! But I didn't feel like driving back to get it XD I ate 2/3rds of it, at least. Besides, the bacon was too fatty and chewy. I like it when it's crispy. Wow, that was quite a subject change.

Tired, will drift to sleep while listening to my favorite Let's Player ^_^

~Lots of Love~

Saturday, December 26, 2009

Lolita Clothes and Future Hauls

Kid's getting all of the hours next week. I'm a little miffed, but maybe I'm just tired XD

Anyway, I found a new Lolita shop today. Why did I not discover them before??? I could have bought from them instead of Bodyline back in October. Well, I wouldn't have been able to get the devil horn headpiece I got there for as little as I got it, but still! They have a lot of cute, inexpensive clothes there! Found myself fawning over practically everything. After I visited Angelic Pretty some time ago and saw a dress for $300 and a coat for $500, I was worried I'd have to live under the rule of Bodyline ;_; They're nice and all, but I really wanted a dress that looked a little more delicate. Qutieland does it for me for sure! I don't regret my Rakuten purchase at all (I really wanted that coat after all!) so I guess I'm glad I didn't know about them before. It would have been such a hard decision! It was already a hard decision shopping at the one store, weeding out the ones I absolutely could not skip out on! Then it would have been crazy, trying to figure out what to buy at this store too! Hopefully I can buy from them next paycheck, and hopefully one of the dresses I really want will be there. I can buy it now, but I'd rather have Mitsuwa to tide me over ^^ This store will be my goto for my tax refund, and they better believe when I get a better paying job, they'll be seeing my paypal address tons! ^_^

Whenever I find a new Lolita site that I absolutely love, I always get excited and show everyone I know who's into this stuff too. It'll probably subside once I've seen the site about 300 times, but it's fun to get excited about this kind of stuff. I hope I like this kind of fashion for a good long time, and I think I will, as long as I stay away from the EGL community! Hey, Lolita stemmed from women's desires to step outside of the norm, to do something fun, even at the expense of people's opinions of them. They probably got laughed at or ridiculed, but they walked down the street with their heads held high and smiles on their faces. Some people are just being too strict in following the rules! They'll never be happy if they're limiting themselves! And what's the fun in wearing something as 'out there' as Lolita if there's 100 rules to follow? The first Lolitas broke the rules on what 'normal' women should wear! Besides, we're already getting flack from people not into the style. I don't need it from my own 'kind'. Lol. VIVA LA LOLITA! No matter what brand or style you like <3 (<-me rambling)

Anyway, my birthday is tomorrow! I'll be 24 ^___^ I feel so old! It's been 6 years since I went to high school, can you believe it? The 80s are so far away now! Soon, I'll be 30, it's so weird! I hope I'm not still working this 'after school' job then too XD Who knows what kind of crazy fashion I'll be into. Oh yeah, I found out Christmas that I get my eccentric fashion sense from my grandma. We were always in a class of our own when it came to this stuff. I hope to pass it on to my future kids too. Seems it only goes with the girls though. I wonder if I'll have a daughter that likes Lolita or Hime-Gyaru, or Koakuma-kei too. Or maybe there will be some random new fashion that sweeping the underground nation. Maybe my future child will be a fashion pioneer! Haha, I guess someday I'll see, but first, I kind of have to have a boyfriend. One step at a time.

Going to take a nap now. Soooo sleepy lately.... I didn't even realize I never even tried to practice any hairstyles or makeup at all yesterday! I'm getting some fake eyelashes, some liquid liner (mine is kind of crappy, but then again I did buy it for like $1), some neutral eyeshadows, and a white one for highlighting, some nude lipsticks, some lip glosses and tints (might be even better to just get a couple of nice lipstick colors and use the lip brush that's coming with my incoming brush set), and a versatile blush color, something subtle. Maybe a nice base so my stuff won't smudge, right? I'm slowly working on my 'must have' collection. I also want to get a few face masks (they had some that I heard were really good), some bath salts, and if I can swing by the mall, I have to visit the Lush store (we have one of those!! They have everything cool at the Woodfield mall!) and get some tea tree spray and tablets. My face loves tea tree oil, seriously. Is this what's considered a 'haul'? Geez, I've just said that word about 40 times in my head, now the word doesn't make sense! Don't you hate when that happens?

Gah, I want to go to Schaumburg tomorrow! But I'm working, and the earliest time Tara is available is Tuesday! If I go before her, I'll have no money to spend! ;____; Impaaaaaaatient!

The more I get into this, the more I really get into this. I need an eccentric friend like me, so I can gush about all of this silly stuff like beauty products, Japanese fashion, ball joint dolls, designing things and coming up with stories we'll never work on, and video games. I have a friend for all of my needs separately, but no jack-of-all-trades friend! Where do I find one of those? Craigslist?

~Lots of Love~

Friday, December 25, 2009


Hello ^^
How are you all? I hope you're doing well.

Sorry I haven't updated as 'once-a-day' as I wanted XD I was just being lazy on the 22nd and 23rd (especially on the 23rd, as I was home all day). I had a very full day yesterday, with work from 7:30a to 1p, then I came home, went to sleep until 3:30, when I had to go and pick up the orders my grandma made at my favorite restaurant Ichiro's and at Brown's Chicken (meatballs, surprisingly). Then family showed up and Christmas~ I went to sleep right after, and I slept for 12 hours! lol

I got lots of money, some cute clothes, and a very pretty bracelet. Oh, and a set of the softest pajamas I've ever felt <3 I love these socks the most XD

Anyway, it's the day after. I'm glad we celebrate on Christmas Eve, it means I get to relax all day. No obligations, just a nice day off. Sure, I get them all the time, but it's different, I guess because there's also leftover delicious food!

Oh, and today, I ordered from Rakuten! It took a lot of work, trying to figure out what I wanted most, what I would have to hold off getting.... Since they sold out of the one pair of boots I wanted (sob sob) I had to get my second choice, similar, and also cute, but they don't come in pink ;_____;.

Here's what I finally decided to order---

In white (I wanted pink, but white goes with more. I'll get pink next time, if they have it)

In pink (The one thing I absolutely had to get right away!)

In black (I wanted some heels! It's on my list to learn how to walk in them, and they might as well be cute XD)

In white (lucky! It was the color I wanted, and it was the only color they had!)

In white (it was a hard decision between black and white, but white goes with more of my things)

In white (I didn't really like the pink ones, and I worried the black ones would become hidden in my hair color!)

In white (*facepalm* I didn't realize these were on reserve! Oh well, it's too cold to enjoy them anyway, I'll have to wait until January 15th)

When they come, I'll post some pictures. Shopping at Rakuten was a little scary, because I had never bought anything overseas where they weren't shipping internationally. I guess it'll give me the chance to tell you how Tenso is as well (the shopping service I went with). They'll be sending me my bill on the 28th, hopefully I'll be up early enough to send them the money before they leave for vacation. I want my pretty new coat now! XD

Afterwards, I got a Coastal Scents brush set. I wanted the plum one, but they ran out! Had to get their Gunmetal Deluxe set instead. I don't know what half those brushes do! But it was cheaper that way, than getting the brushes I wanted individually. Oh well, I guess more for me to learn. I want to save at least $100, excluding my $100 card which I'll use at Mitsuwa (kinda, lol. Raiding the bookstore and the makeup isle, and possibly getting some hair coloring! Might as well use it lots, because if I don't use it within the year, they'll start taking money!) I'm slowly building my makeup set. I'm pretty excited ^^ My pretty pink makeup box will be full of treats one day.

Let's see, every so often, I'll check my horoscope transits, which is when they check the alignments of the planets and compare them to your birth chart or something.... Something rose to the top, literally out of the blue (as in it wasn't there one day, and suddenly it was):
"Positive aspect: Excellent time for love. If you haven't already met that special someone, expect to meet your lover during this period."
Lasts through to the 28th, which is when this one takes effect:
"Positive aspect: You will be very attracted by a member of the opposite sex. This person will be the type you like, with a very strong personality."

I'd love to jump to conclusions, but that's how my problems start, lol. But I guess I better start getting while the getting is good. If I don't act fast, he could start hanging out with other girls, who will shamelessly make a move.

We all know who I'm talking about, right?

Anyway, I'm just going to relax, eat some delicious crab bisque and 'steal' some of the blooming tea I bought grandma. I'll make plans with my friend to spend some more of my money, lol. I'm starting to like Christmas again~ Merry... All holidays! And if you don't celebrate anything, I still hope you have a good end of 2009 ^_^

~Lots of Love~

Monday, December 21, 2009


Figured I'd post now, because I won't be coming home until late, and I might forget.

This week will be pretty hectic, all the work I've got to do.... And I won't be seeing the Kid at all until Saturday! *sobsob*

Anyway, I got a message from one of my exes, telling me he had a dream about me. I won't get into why we broke up, let's just say he's regretted it tremendously since then, and has asked for me to come back many times. I finally told him that there was no chance for the two of us to ever get back together, but I know he still thinks about it. He used to be really goofy, never really taking things seriously, now he's become all introspective, and he makes a lot of what tend to be depressing observations. And he's working out now. Where was this less goofy, exercising guy when *I* was dating him?? I could never get him to do anything outside of sitting around watching Law & Order....

My skin has been on a rampage recently. It's being rebellious, though I haven't changed anything in my routine. I think I need a chemical peel. Way too much dead skin on my face.... Sometimes 'beautifying' is annoying!

Just 3 more days, I'm celebrating Christmas! I'm actually excited~ I'm going to get that Hello Kitty luggage (hope it's there!!) and the cutest coat, and warm, cute gloves, and some clothes! Lol, that's like $200 there, I hope I get quite a bit of money after my payment to the doll company XD I know, I know, it's not all about gifts, just, I'm really excited to be getting the chance to do something I've always wanted to do.

Going to go, I've got work in an hour. *sob* No Kid! I want him to visit me....

Sunday, December 20, 2009


I came to work really late, so they called someone else. I'm terrible!

Anyway, started working more on my Rakuten page. Got myself a 'Japanese' address, it's all really cool ^^ Now I can order from places like Atelier BOZ! Not that I can afford them now.... Anyway, today, I'm going to recuperate. It's impossible for me to currently sleep at a normal time (even when I sleep at a normal time, the next day, I'm back to not being able to sleep at a good time. Maybe it's a sign I need to move out west? Lol, I wish I could! I need a change of pace. But....

Hehe, I'm starting to like the new kid more and more ^^ But I won't talk about that. It's kind of embarrassing to, anyway.

Oh, totally digressed, I put everything I really wanted to buy in my 'shopping cart' to see about how much I'd be spending if I had the cash. It came out to around $1000, before shipping. It would probably be like $1400 after all the fees. I don't know what to take out! I want them all XD I'll have to pick my favorites. The coat I really want is around $80 on its own.... Hope I get a bunch for Christmas!

Sleep now!

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Under the Weather

Ugh.... Feeling not so 100%.... I haven't eaten much all day, since I didn't have much money to spare. I was going to get something from some Dollar Menu, but I remembered that my grandma had made some chicken.... So I thought, when I got home, she had finished it all! So I tried to make pasta. It did *not* turn out well. Well, I mean, it tasted fine, but eating it made me feel so nauseous that I had to stop. It's all we have in the house!

And it couldn't have come at a worse time. My monthly headache is here.... I keep looking in the fridge, hoping I missed something. I did not. I'm tempted to go to McDonald's right now and just get something. Trying to hold off, so I can have lunch tomorrow.

Anyway, started making my Rakuten wishlist. There are a lot of things I definitely want to order for Christmas, and things I want to use my tax refund on as well. One of the boots I was really wanting was sold out though ;_; Found a pair to replace those however. I still have no idea how to use Rakuten.... and neither does anyone else! Lol.

Ah, broke down and got something to eat, but fortunately my grandma was up. She gave me money, so I get to keep mine! Mmm, crispy chicken~! Sure, it's not healthy, but whatevs. At least for now. One day, I'll eat right. And that day will be when I have a good job that pays decently.

Going to eat, and watch my favorite let's player. Not much to report, because I'm just too hungry and tired to think!

Friday, December 18, 2009


Okay, I so have a reason for not blogging yesterday. I was out alllll day! Woke up at 11a to get ready to head out with my friend Tara, to show her the mall. We got lost! Not on the way to, inside the mall! It's just that huge~! I showed her the Disney store, which she wandered around, then we went to the Sanrio store, so I could show her the luggage I wanted. She bought me a purse for my birthday/Christmas! So I returned the favor, bought her the softest panda plushie in the world. I sneaked it ^^ Then we headed to Chevy's and shared a Sizzlin' Fajita. It was so filling! I didn't realize there was so much!! We went to Mitsuwa, of course, and bought treats. She wanted another Ramune, but we discovered their coffee section. She looooooves coffee. I ended up taking pictures of our selection *will try to remember to post later* Oooh, I also bought a Yogu, white peach flavored. I used to love these in college! I'll save it for breakfast~ Green tea for tonight.

Afterwards, we went back to Tara's house. While she washed dishes, found a blast to the past: the game Bust-A-Groove 2. Now, when we were in 8th grade, I introduced her to the game Bust-A-Groove, a game where you press buttons to keep your character dancing, and the object is to score higher than the other. It brought back so many memories! I played it a few times, then Tara and I played as people started to show up. I won, 2 out of 3! (I only lost that other one, because I played as a character I wasn't familiar with, while she played with her favorite, I did beat her with my favorite girl Shorty XD) I met her boyfriend, turns out he knows a lot of people who work/ed at our store. He's pretty nice, I approve ^^ Then we watched Fight Club. I already knew the plot twist, but I didn't know how it reached that point. It was a really good movie! Oh, and when Tara went to the bathroom, I ended up in a man hug sandwich o_o Very awkward! Lol.

I was out until 12:30a, a first, outside of being at work, fixing up a billion things that need to be fixed because someone important is showing up. But they hang out on Thursdays, I'm usually working Thursday evenings! Ah well. Tara decided she really likes Lolita, so she'll get into it with me. I have someone to take pictures with!

I found an excellent hair color today, I'm going to get it, lighten my hair, and color my hair a sort of pink color ^^ Well, I want to, I think it would be such a cute color in hime-style.

Gotta get to sleep today. Work tomorrow in 12 hours, and I've got to let the new kid know that I'll protect him from my boss. He's been teasing him lots, and I just don't want this kid to leave. He's the best thing this store has gotten! DON'T SCARE HIM AWAY! HE MAKES WORK EASIER FOR US ALL! ;____;

Oooh yeah, this morning, I sent my grandpa a new cellphone, then called him to let him know I had it shipped to him. He was really happy to hear from me. I love my Poppy~~~<3 We chatted for a bit, and he let me know he got me a birthday present! Last year, he gave me a birthday present as well, it was the first time in years. Lately, they've been coming in abundance, I'm really happy! Not because it's a gift, but because they're thinking of me ^^ Now I can try to remember their birthdays too, lol.

Gotta go wash my face, it's so oily now!

~Lots of Love~

Wednesday, December 16, 2009


I love Schaumburg.

Even the bad drivers are better over there.

Headed over the Schaumburg, to go to the Sanrio store and get my little cousin a purse. Now, I'm in no way that into Sanrio, with the exception of a few characters (mostly Pochacco, who they never feature on anything anymore, but he's my absolute favorite!) BUT! This store changed everything. Saw the cutest purse ever, and don't get me started on this adorable gold and red Hello Kitty day luggage (small luggage bag). It was half off too! But I had to use all of my money on gifts!! Why didn't I see this last time I came out?? *sob* I hope it's there after Christmas! I also bought my store one of these water filled sticky ball things, shaped like a pig. I knew they'd play with it right away, and sure enough, my boss Chevy threw it all around. Then he threw it on the ceiling, lol. It got stuck! After throwing a book at it a few times, he had to go get the ladder. Yep, I knew they'd like it.

My gift for grandma came in today. She answered the door to take it, and made a snide remark about how she got my package, after I had been asleep during the time her package had come in and therefore couldn't get it. Lol, I wanted to make a comment about how it was her gift, but of course I didn't. Her little tea set is so cute! Comes with a little strainer for loose teas, and it's glass, so she can see the blooming teas that I bought for her 'bloom'. I spent the most on her gift, but I guess in the end, it's also for me too. I love tea~!

Also, when I was at the mall, I saw the cutest oversized plaid shirt and long vest. I wanted to look at it, but it was in an Abercrombie & Fitch. Ever since they discriminated against an old friend who was dressed punk style, I don't like them. No, I don't mean he was snubbed, I mean someone came up and actually told him they had nothing to sell to a guy like him. I tell everyone that story when I can.

Told my mom all I wanted for Christmas was money. She was really happy, because it meant she didn't have to think about it. It's perfect for me, because then the stress is on me! And then I won't end up with a gift I can't use. Nyaa, just 1 more week! We celebrate on Christmas Eve, a tradition that started 2 years ago when my mom was supposed to be spending Christmas with her husband's family, but then didn't. It stuck, because it's so much easier. We don't have a huge dinner, just some dips and snacks, we hang out for about an hour, then open presents, then spend time hanging out. The day after, I can do what I want (need to make a payment on my ball joint doll though, so that's $114 out of whatever I'm getting ^^;), so the stress is on me! XD I will be doing some Rakuten shopping. (hopefully, the things at the top of my want list won't be gone) Will rush to the Sanrio store and get that suitcase, if they have it. New curling iron, something cute from I was originally wanting this money to get a ball joint doll from Soom, but my goals have taken priority. Hopefully they won't be cute at all XD Oh, my paycheck is coming in on the 25th too! No clue how much I'm getting, I should figure that out. Probably around $200-some. I can add some make-up and brushes from Coastal Scents. This and tax refund day in February.... How lovely~ I've waited all year for this, the few times of the year where I have spare money for myself.

I didn't make it to Mitsuwa today, so I'm going tomorrow with my friend~! Going to introduce her to the 7th biggest mall in the US as well, lol. I love Woodfield. It's huge and pretty and fancy.

I need to start doing sit-ups. I'm gaining so much weight after my anemia has gone, it's all going to my chest and some to my stomach ;_; I don't want to be all thin with a pouch! Gotta start fixing my sleep schedule too. I've got to get up early! So much work to embody the Lolita lifestyle.... -_-;

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Christmas shopping

I don't know, are bras supposed to hurt your chest? I bought a 34C bra today, and it still feels so tight on my chest. I know I can't be a 36 anything, because it keeps slipping up, so I'm guessing it's something to do with the cup size. Ugh, I don't know....

Will be finishing my Christmas shopping tomorrow. I'm buying my little cousin a bag from the Sanrio store in Schaumburg (I hope the store is still there!) and a Tracfone for Poppy (the grandpa~<3). I have to stop by Mitsuwa again, this time for my boss, not me. He *really* loves those muscat gummies that Kasugai makes. Will ask Tara to come with, if she's available. She never got the chance to see the mall (she wants to see the Disney store they have, hopefully that's still there as well), and it's been years since I've been there myself. It's really nice~

One day during the summer, I think I'll head to the Oakbrook Center. I never got the chance to explore back in October, it was freezing! It's really high-end, so I wonder if I'll be able to find something my speed there. But I bet it's really nice! It's huge, I got lost in there twice, lol.

I've been getting into a lot of things, like decoden and fancy nails, and adorable shoes! But easiest to get into, I've been reading blogs. Now, I know they're just normal people, living normal lives. Sometimes, they've got nothing going on either. But when I read them, I'm always so enthralled, just reading what's happening in these random people's lives. Why does everyone else seem so interesting? Even their boring days seem more exciting than mine. I wonder if that's what it's like reading what I post for others? Probably not. My boring is the basis for boring! See, today, I went to work. There was one person after another. Sold lots of the new Mario for the Wii. Then came home. Went back out to buy a bra at Orland Square. Came home and told mom what I was getting everyone for Christmas, as well as what I wanted (money). Then I came online and started typing this while watching the Daily Show and the Colbert Report. Will play more Atelier Annie, in an attempt to get a different ending from before while listening to my favorite let's player Kikoskia play some games.

That's it.
Nah, that can't be entertaining to anyone -_-;

But anyway, these people, while just regular folk like you and me (except for Riho Nishiyama, as she is a model on Koakuma Ageha, but then again, I don't 'read' her blog, I just look at her cute pictures XD) are like celebrities to me. I guess their bored seems more fun, because when they have more fun, and don't know what it's like to have nothing to do over and over.... Angst angst angst.

I need another magazine along the lines of Ageha. I'm not too into Ganguro, so I can never really get immersed in Egg, Ranzuki seems too casual (I've been doing casual cute all my life, I need a change!), and I crave that over-the-top glamorous feel that I can't find in Soup. Scawaii came close, but in the end, it felt like they were trying to be seductive and model-y with all of the pouting and looking serious and edgy. I like how fun and light everything seems in Ageha. My style is definitely 'cute'. With a face like mine, I can't pull off seductive, not without looking like a 17 year old trying to look like a 24 year old, lol. Besides, it's probably my charm point. Lol, what am I going to do when I start to look older and can't pull off that cute look? I bring them in with it, and completely blind-sight them with wit. IT'S ALL I'VE GOT!


~Lots of Love~

Monday, December 14, 2009

Where'd it go?

Lol, I knew I should have written before work, but I figured since I was too busy getting ready that I would end up late while typing this out. I got home, went straight to my DS until I went to sleep! Also, where did Saturday's go?? I could have sworn I wrote my last entry on Saturday, when I went out with my friend. In fact, I know I did! It was like 6 in the morning when I did it, and I was lamenting not being able to sleep! (EDIT: Figured it out, had the timezone wrong, so while I started this after midnight, it registered as 10p before!) Ah, whatever, I'll try to be more diligent now. Sorry....

My face is clearing up, after I had a bad breakout from using a face mask with olive oil in it. I should have known something was wrong when I put in on my face, and part of my face felt weird, like kind of numb. I shrugged it off, because I wasn't allergic to any of the ingredients. Sure enough, I had huuuuuge cystic pimples all over my face, and they hurt so much! ;_; Well, I rushed back to the good face mask/scrub, containing green tea, apple cider vinegar, honey, and sugar. Sure enough, using that twice a week, and washing my face twice a day, my face bounced back better than ever ^^ I didn't worry, skin is skin. Sometimes it's really fickle, and the slightest change in something irritates the skin, and sometimes you're not doing anything in particular, and your skin is just perfect. At least, that's how it happens with me. I still don't know what to eat and not eat for my face to go crazy, besides drinking pop. Can't drink that too much, my face breaks out within 2 hours -_-; I liked pop....

Christmas is coming, but because of all of the "YOU CAN'T CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS, YOU MUST CELEBRATE 'HOLIDAY'!!!! CHRISTMAS IS SOMEHOW OFFENSIVE!!!!!" people, it just doesn't feel like Christmas, outside of the tons of people coming to our store. I kind of miss the old days, the excitement of Christmas people used to have. Come on people! Do what you used to do when Christmas came around. Now everyone's threatening lawsuits....

Worked with the new guy today. He's very hard working, but I can see he's a bit shy, not really sure how to interact. We ended up talking to him at the end of the day when pretty much no one was showing up and all of the work was done. He's really nice, and super tall! O_O and apparently, he's a little younger than my 19 year old boss, lol. Seems like a nice guy. I'm hoping we'll get rid of our lazy coworker and take the new guy on. And I hope the new guy will get to open up some. Lol, it's guys like him that bring out my motherly instinct to worry about how they're doing in life.

I'm not really talking much about how I'm doing, goal-wise. I haven't really been doing anything, not with all of the shopping for Christmas because I don't have a proper job and all. I've been playing Atelier Annie! I'm loving on my winning team, mostly because they're the two most adorable/powerful/hilarious guys I've met in-game (one is a guy obsessed with defeating everyone and becoming stronger, and the other is a guy who seems to be a thief, has no sense of direction and tends to starve himself trying to find his way back home. He even got lost in the village while running an errand and passed out in an alley, lol) I love NIS games. Going to get Sakura Wars when it comes out April! Oh, but yeah, no goal oriented things happening. Though I guess I can check one thing off of my list. I wanted to find my style, I think 'being cute' is definitely a style! VICTORY!

~Lots of Love~

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Headaches and Adventures

My head is pounding. Well, this isn't something new, it happens like once a month. I have to wait for the aspirin to kick in -_-; I'm so sleepy! (though it's a trap, I'll probably wake up in 2 hours, unable to sleep again.

Writing extra early because today, I've got plans, and I don't want to forget to honor my promise of updating daily! Meeting up with an old friend from high school. She and I used to do a lot of weird things, especially for our age. Like the time she and I would bring our Beanie Babies to class and play during free time. Seriously, play. We would talk for them and everything. In 7th grade. We caught a lot of flack for doing it, but we didn't care. Oh, and the time we used to.... role play? I guess it was that. We lived in the Pokemon world, lol. We were trainers and everything (I was a Dragon type trainer, and she was a Water type), and we would talk and write about all of our made of characters, as well as characters from the Pokemon series (then later, Digimon as we got into that) were real. We used to write each other comic notes in high school, that is, we would write a note, draw lots of little pictures around it, and then on the back, write a comic. It was great, to have a friend as eccentric as I was, though I guess I didn't appreciate it. I always wanted to hang out with Christina, our very popular friend. We kind of fought over her attentions, to the point where we would ridicule the other if at any point she didn't understand what the other was doing.

Terrible time in my life, to be honest. My friendship with Christina ended once I went to college, and somewhere around October, after a huge talk (mostly her accusing me of things, and me just being frustrated with the whole situation) we decided we probably shouldn't associate anymore. It was for the best, the only thing she and I had in common was school and the fact that we are females. Otherwise, we're just opposites not just in tastes but in personality, morals, lives.... That's something completely different though, and to be honest, I don't really care to talk about her anymore. All in the past, you know.

Anyway, Tara and I lived in our own little world where no one could touch us. I've never matched this with anyone else, even among my other best friends that have come and gone (current being someone who moved away ;_;). She still loves Japan like before, and she still has eccentric tastes like I do, though she's a bit sated in comparison to me, the girl who hopes to encompass 'cute' simply because she loves cute things.

I'm taking her to Mitsuwa, a Japanese grocery/book store/video rental/make up counter/restaurant, AKA just plain awesome. I've got money, I'm ready to speeeeend~! Hoping they have another Koakuma Ageha (my favorite magazine, I'm obsessed), and maybe a book on eye make up or decoden. And then a bag full of treats! Strawberry Daifuku, you better wait for me~

I worry a bit though. I love my friend lots, but she has a tendency to.... I don't know, kiss up? She'll pretend everything I'm doing is so cool, and then turn to someone else and be like "Ew, she's so strange, right?" and of course, she'll probably tell me about someone she's rolling her eyes at, even though they don't think anything is wrong. I'll have to let her know I have no tolerance for it anymore. I'd hate to lose a great friend, but I cannot deal with that kind of silly drama anymore. Even if she likes hanging out with me, she doesn't have to love everything I do. If something I'm into weirds her out, by all means, she is free to believe it's silly, but for her to go behind my back and ridicule me with all of her friends, I don't want someone like that in my life. I'm almost 24. I haven't been in high school for around 6 years. I broke all of those silly backstabbing-to-please habits. I hope she can too.


Signed up to Rakuten yesterday morning, from what I gather, I now have 2,000 points, but in the end, I have no idea what anything says. I'll figure it out somehow though. Deary clothes and shoes! It's so adorable, I can't even stand it. I'm going to have a hard time determining how I'll spend my Christmas money (hopefully I'll get some). Love my family, but because they like to think they know all about me, but they use very outdated information (I remember when you were 12 you liked Barbies!), I always end up with lots of things I just can't use. I don't like wasting money or space with non-functional things, so it's less like "Oh, I'm so ungrateful" and more "I'm not even going to use this, where am I going to keep it??? You should have saved your money!"

I guess I'll update this post after my day with my friend. I've got to clean out my car!

Oh, and I've discovered I'm a 32 small C. The bottom half is definitely C, but because it slopes down, it looks smaller (so like, think of a 32 full C, and cut it at a diagonal, it's like that). I finally found a measuring technique that actually worked. The ones I kept finding basically told me I was a 32AA. Umm.... I may be small, but I'm pretty sure if I'm mostly filling up a 36B, then I'm definitely not a 32AA. Not since I was 13, at least....

But this does explain why my small shirts suddenly hurt to wear because they're so tight, and why I have to remove the padding from my push-up bra sometimes. I'm gaining all the weight I lost last year when I had a severe case of anemia, and it looks like it's going back to the right places ^^ Minor victory to the small of chest!

Does anyone know how to fix this template? I got one, and it's so cute, but it hides everything, I need, so I don't know what to do. Blogger needs a MySpace amount of backgrounds, without all of the creepy guys friending me because they think I'm cute (especially because it specifically says to talk to me before doing so). I should probably leave MySpace.... But they always guilt me into staying, lol.

This blog turned out longer than I wanted. Going to sleeeeeep, at least for the next few hours. I've got a long day, I've got to at least try, headache or not. I'm going to try to do my hair like in my hair book I got last week. Seems easy enough, I can at least come close. I'll take a picture, I'm going decked out in Dandy style as well.


Just got in! My friend and I were out allllllll day~! She didn't know what to expect, but the moment we pulled up, she said "It's like an Asian Walmart!" XD Her heart was gone the second I showed her the bookstore. She couldn't stop raving <3 We realized we still had so much in common, so we're going to hang out a lot more. It'll be our hangout.

She and I talked so much, it was wonderful. We had the same ideas, we were just as eccentric as we were in school. At no point did I ever think I didn't want to share anything with her. I really hope she doesn't go into her old ways, bad-mouthing me to the person she's bad-mouthing to me.... I don't want to loose someone that great.

Bought 3 more books, December's Ageha, some hair magazine, and a Lolita magazine. Then I bought lots of treats. There were a lot of college students, and a really good looking guy working the register. I kind of wanted to talk to him, but then he disappeared. I probably wouldn't have talked to him anyway. How does one start a conversation with a random person? I know "Hi" works, but what then? XD I'm so terrible at this girl thing.

Also, I found a nice sewing class that will actually teach you how to make your own patterns, just what I always wanted. I'll save up to take it.

And I bought a fun new video game for my NIS collection, Atelier Annie (they speak in Japanese with English subtitles!). This was afterwards, when I dropped her off and went to my job to check my hours and bring them treats. I stuck around for a few extra hours, talking about my day, then talking about various things. I've got work tomorrow afternoon.

~Lots of Love~

Friday, December 11, 2009

Le Sigh

Since I didn't really talk about what I've done so far in my last entry, we'll say that this is my first assignment. I'm pretty much on the ground level, setting up foundations and whatnot. That is to say, while I've started this project a month ago, I'm still at the beginner level, and to really explain where I'm coming from, I must start at the beginning. Waaaaaaaay at the beginning. Well, you know, not *that* far back. Ah, you'll see what I mean.

See, before my project, I didn't really take care of myself much. I didn't know how, and it all looked way too hard and complex to begin, when I started looking at how far behind I was. I had Dependent Personality Disorder, an issue where not only do you really depend on people to help you survive, but you absolutely need them. It's not like "I need someone to tell me they love me," it's "I need someone to take care of me." I really did.

I was pretty bad. There were times where I would convince myself I wasn't hungry, even though I hadn't eaten all day, just because there wasn't anything easy to make in the house. My skills were basically Minute Rice, pasta, and frozen dinners. Thing was, everything else just seemed too complicated. I couldn't connect the dots between start and finish. All I knew was that I had an egg, some flour, sugar, and butter, and that somehow, they had to become a 7 tier wedding cake. It's really daunting when you're only looking at start and finish.

I've since realized I need to work in steps, so as to keep me from being overwhelmed, and therefore, giving up before I start. Still have to work on it, but I now know how to make more than just pasta with butter ^_^ I've even made onion rings! Yeah, not complicated, but it was an accomplishment for me!

So anyway, yeah, my whole everything just went to Hell. I had bad, dingy skin with lots of acne scars, because all I ever did was wipe it with a damp, soapy face towel. My hair was long and thick, but because I didn't know how to wash it or straighten it, I had to wait until I had enough money to go to a hairdresser, which meant, ew, unwashed hair for weeks. Besides, I had a straight perm, and in order to keep your hair remaining straight (as the word 'perm' is quite misleading), you can't wash it but once every 3 weeks (and every 6 weeks was the perm touch-up). It's a lot of money, and I work at what should essentially be a job for teenagers, as in, I don't even make the bracket for lower class. I'm not even on the map when it comes to yearly salary.

This is digressing.

My hair was gross at the scalp, and dry at the ends. In February, after a break-up, I up and decided I wanted it short. Last time I had it short, was back in 6th grade.... major disaster. I looked like a little boy ;_; Well, this was what I needed for my hair: a clean slate. I didn't start washing it at that point, but I had gotten rid of every split end I had in one fell swoop. And my hair looked nice ^^ I've decided I will grow it again (it was about 24inches before the cut), this time, taking care of it. It's growing out beautifully now, and it's grown around 4 inches.

This is where I'm beginning.

In November, while looking at videos on YouTube, I noticed an adorable face staring back at me in the Featured Video section. This face changed everything. See, this video belonged to a woman who called herself 'Bubbi'. She was a make-up guru, but a different kind, someone specializing in quick techniques, instead of flashy ones. Seeing that looking good doesn't have to be a 5 hour deal made me feel a lot more confident about improving the health of my skin and hair, but it was her video about how to be happy that sealed the deal. She simply said just go for it. Probably the simplest concept known to man, and I was just now getting it. Just go for it. Instead of wishing and wanting and hoping and praying.... Just go for it.

You ever see that episode of Spongebob, where Patrick falls off of a cliff and when Spongebob puts the brain coral on Patrick's head, there's a scene where a plug goes into a socket, and all of the gears in his head start turning for the first time ever? Yeah, that's exactly what happened.

So... I started to go for it. I bought myself my very first beauty-geared item: a hair straightener. It was cute and pink ^^ Bought some Chi Silk-Infusion, and a moisturizing cream. Discovered the cream wasn't good for my hair. My first discovery! Bought some face cleansers. Found one that didn't dry my face out instantly. What, you mean that face cleansers are not supposed to make your face feel *that* dry while you're in the middle of washing? Another discovery! I grew up believing that things were exactly as they seemed. What you get is what you will always get. I never knew there were... options. If it's not good, I can do better. If it doesn't work, find something that does. It makes sense. So why didn't it to me until just now?

Since I'm so behind, I'm still learning. Taking advice, reading reviews, and whatnot. I have a list of things I want to accomplish. I originally had 5 things checked off, but again, I was still stuck in the ways of just settling for average. My shampoo/conditioner is really nice, makes my hair very shiny and soft, but the flyaways are unbearable, and it smells like nothing. I need something very rich for my hair. For my face, I went back to Noxema, since the Clean & Clear face scrub just made my face feel so unbearably dry, even while I was in the middle of using it. It's only been one night, but I like Noxema's scrub, and I should have gone to them in the first place. They were the first facial cleanser I used, and I loved it then, what was I thinking, going elsewhere? But I think I need a lotion better suited for combination skin like mine. The oil on my face is pretty concentrated around my nose, with a spot under my lip, and between my eyebrows. Rest of it is dryyyyyyy. Do I have to do like a mixture of lotions? Like, use one lotion for the oily sections, and one for the dry? I don't know, but I guess I'll find out one way or another.

Trying out some new shampoo and conditioner as well. Went for Herbal Essence. Shampoo for long hair, since I'm growing mine out, and conditioner for an overload on conditioning.... or it's the other way around, I can't be bothered to go across the hallway to check ^^; And a Garnier hairspray, because while I have very thick hair that can hold a curl for a long time (at least 3 hours before they start to fall), I need something even stronger, to keep my ringlets in for a few more hours. Yeah, another technique from my muse Bubbi, is how to get curls from a straightener. Made my life, because ever since a curling iron fell on my arm as a kid, I was terrified of curling irons. Losing the fear now, and so I will be getting one sometime, but at least I can still get variety from my wonderful straightener (a limited pink Solia). You know, the straighteners I grew up were those big, flat ones, where you could only make your hair straight or give it a flip. I didn't know these things existed before Bubbi. The more you know! *shooting star*

My post is now on rambling, and if by chance my first visitor has wandered in, I apologize, it's just that I have to really explain where I'm coming from to make this trek a little easier to understand. I'm a clueless girl trying to figure out how to take care of herself inside and out, basically. This is a whole 'nother beast here that I'm dealing with. Daunting, but exciting, especially when I look at all the cute things I can have~ Can't wait until Christmas, hopefully I get some money to buy clothes from Rakuten. I'm in love with Deary clothes. Seriously, why don't adorable things like that exist here?? Sexy is so overrated (or maybe I'm just saying that because I can only pull off 'cute' and 'child-like'?)

Also, I wonder if instead of at least once a week, I should do this once every day. It seems like a lot, but, heck, you get homework almost every day. Besides, it would definitely keep me on track, but then I wonder, would anyone be upset if I missed a day? Doubt it.... I doubt anyone even wants to read this but me anyway! I'll try for once a day, I know I'm running at full speed now, because it's early, and these are my first entries, but eventually, the novelty will probably wear off. I'll start slowing down, and soon, it'll be entries like "So.... I took a nap.... Bye!" or something. I don't know, the more I think about it though, the more I like a daily blog. It'll keep me focused, so I'm not losing sight of my goals. I want to accomplish so much by the end of 2010, and I don't want to slack off, like I did with NaNoWriMo.... -_-;

Once a day it is, even if nothing has happened. I'll set an alarm if I have to.

~Lots of Love~

Thursday, December 10, 2009


I should be sleeping, but instead, I'm going to embark on a SUPER LIFE CHANGING EVENT today.

Something like that.

Today, I'm going to turn myself into a ~princess~. Well, not like a real princess of course, but kind of.
Look, what I mean is that, I've lived my whole life in the shadows, never standing out when I could. Choosing the safe and easy route because I figured I'd fail if I tried something new. Always looking at the exciting opportunities out there, but dismissing them because dreams just don't come true.

Maybe I could have been a star.
Maybe I'd be living the dream.
Someone's dream, at least.
But alas, I am not. In my twenties, looking at what seems like everyone else's life being super exciting and full of adventure. Not saving the world adventure, not even meeting famous people adventures. Typical everyday adventures that I'm sure they take for granted.

GAH! I'm *tired* of living life as a background extra! Suddenly, all the years I drifted through life, telling myself that I'm okay with this, that this is all the fun I want, that I don't want to travel, or try new things. I'm a go-with-the-flow kind of girl, right?

I am not.

I want to be the one making waves!

I am somewhat lying; I made this realization back in the beginning of November ^^
BUT, today is the day I document my changes. Day by day, or whenever I update this thing. I figure if I'm writing down what I'm doing, maybe I won't turn lazy and get bored with it or something. In the end, even if my goal turns out different, I just can't continue hoping that one day I'll wake up and things will change. It hasn't worked for years. Probably not going to work. Maybe, but the chances are pretty slim. I'd probably have a better chance of being attacked by falling pigeons.

So, today, we'll say today is the day.
We'll move in a direction that leads me somewhere nice. Somewhere not here. Because here is boring. It's full of TV shows I don't watch and a messy room with barely any furniture. I want to be somewhere full of clothes that I haven't been wearing for the past 2 years because "my clothes are still perfectly functional." I want to do almost the opposite of what I'm doing right now (but probably no going to clubs. I went to one, it was pretty boring, but then again, I was with a group of people, only one of whom was my close cousin and friend, and even he was with his girlfriend)

This is a rather long entry, because I've got a lot of ground work to lay out.
Because I didn't think I actually cared, there's a lot of things I never bothered to learn back in high school. Things that most women are now expert in. Like how to take care of their skin, and exercise. When girls were trying to learn how to do their hair in different styles, I was napping my days away. When everyone was talking about that one time they went to such-and-such to hang out, I was playing a video game I had already played and beat 20 times before. Life passed me by for 10 years. I wasn't smart enough to actually do something during it....

I've got to take the time to finally learn about myself. Finding my strengths and weaknesses. And I've decided that 2010 is the year I'll do it. The whole year. Yes, I'm making an event of it, not just a passing thought.

And you can watch, if you want. Maybe there's someone like me who suddenly decided they too were tired of their mundane life. Maybe there's someone out there who can kick my butt into gear when I start slacking off. Watch me as I learn how to become said princess. Why a princess? Well, because this all started when I wanted to be the very embodiment of Lolita. After discovering Koakuma Ageha, I'm just now seeing that, really, I just like to look cute no matter how (ironically, because I used to hate being considered 'cute', especially in a country where people like to be 'sexy'). And besides, everyone always notices princesses in the crowd, without them trying to be noticed. That's what I want. I want to stand out, not so that everyone will see me and love me, but so that I can finally look at myself and see that I really exist. That I'm not a background extra, I'm at least the second leading girl. I don't know what I'm doing, but I guess I won't know until I learn for myself.

Once a week. I will update this at least once a week. I won't even give myself an option, I need to do this, to show myself what I've done so far. Even if nothing has happened, I'll post a report of what I've done, or even what I'm doing and what I want to do. I know if I don't do this, I'll never do it. Then I'll be stuck here every day. Bored out of my mind and hoping maybe something will happen anyway. For another 10 years.....

Now I really, really should get to sleep. I probably won't though. My sleep schedule is probably set to Korea or something.

~Lots of Love~